As you consider applying the concepts outlined here, I ask you to consider our ultimate model of flexiture: Jesus modeled flexible structuring throughout his ministry: He showed us how to stand on our principles and yet be flexible enough to forgive those who were seen as unforgivable.
Jesus showed extreme “flexible structure” to so many, but my favorite is Peter because “The Rock” struggled with impulsivity and inattention. Anytime Peter had a thought on his mind, it quickly surfaced with little contemplation. Sometimes, it came out as an inquisitive question and other times, it came out as a foolish statement. All the while, Jesus met Peter’s needs with flexible structure: He patiently, flexibly answered Peter’s unending questions with the same absolute truths He taught over and over again.
In one night – the night Jesus was arrested and tried – we see many aspects of Peter’s struggles. His poor sustained attention to boring 
and monotonous tasks reduced his mental energy and caused him to sleep instead of pray as his Lord had asked. Later that night, he impulsively cut off Malchus’ ear despite Jesus asking him not to, and the servant of one of Christ’s accusers experienced the miracle of the Savior firsthand.
Even later that night, impulsive fear caused Peter to deny his Lord three times before thinking through the consequences to his own psyche. Once again, Jesus extended His saving grace when He forgave Peter and restored him by asking three times, “How do you love me?”
Although he was one of Jesus’ most trusted disciples, acting before thinking often got Peter in trouble. It also allowed him to teach us about the importance of blind faith like when he jumped out of the boat and walked on the water: he did well until he took his eyes off Christ, and then he sank. Don’t we do the same? Just as with Peter, He is always there waiting to take our hand and escort us back into the boat when we stumble on the waves of life.
As with Peter, the structure of Jesus’ absolutes and the flexibility we desire is demonstrated in His saving grace to each of us. In turn, those of us who know a struggling child are called to show grace to this little one who is asking us to teach them the Truth over and over again in with flexibility and grace.
(c) 2009-2010, flexiture, monte w. davenport, ph.d.
First posted August 29, 2009
